Resilience in Action

Unlocking a Mindset That Fuels Growth and Recovery

Photo by Emre on Unsplash

I woke up at 6:30 this morning and quickly remembered the list of chores I dreaded having to do. Then I realized my computer wasn’t working, my knees still ached, one of the cats threw up, and my glasses weren’t by the bed. I just knew it was going to be one of “those” days. My first reaction was a combination of anger, frustration, and feeling sorry for myself - why me?

I’m familiar with the benefits of positive thinking and maintaining a positive mindset. So, when it seems like it’s going to be a bad day, I typically encourage myself to keep going and focus on the thought, “This too will pass.” Which works, sort of.

However, I recently learned about a resilient mindset—the mental framework of someone who can adapt and bounce back from adversity, stress, and challenges, viewing them as opportunities for growth rather than insurmountable obstacles.

Resilience research acknowledges that we often face difficulties and painful challenges in life. It involves learning from mistakes, seeking support as needed, and maintaining a positive outlook, even in the face of difficult situations.

The primary difference between the two is that a positive mindset emphasizes a generally optimistic and constructive outlook on situations, and a resilient mindset focuses on adapting to and recovering from adversity, which really is an unavoidable part of life.

It acknowledges the positive in an experience and uses the negative to strengthen our mental fortitude. In other words, it doesn’t deny the inevitability of suffering or that mistakes and failures are typical.

Experts suggest we can develop a resilient mindset by doing the following.

1. Find meaning in everyday life.

2. Learn from the past.

3. Stay hopeful.

4. Care for the self.

5. Take action.

With a resilient mindset, facing the challenges of the day with those tips in mind, knowing to focus on solutions, and finding the silver lining even though nothing sis going right, those problems looked different.

• List of chores - Ok. I’ll identify what needs to be done today and by what time. Postponing some tasks until tomorrow can also make the list less overwhelming.

• My computer—First, I’ll restart the computer, which sometimes solves the problem. Then I can read online, watch YouTube, or ask others for ideas on how to fix the issue. There are several computer experts in my family.

• My knees hurt. Ice and exercise have helped in the past, so I’ll start with that. There are ice packs in the freezer.

• The glasses—I figured out where I used them last, and there they were right by the computer. They’re reader glasses; I’ll order an extra pair as a backup.

• The cat threw up - That’s easy to clean, so I’ll take care of it quickly. Maybe she didn’t like the new cat food. That’s good information.

That reminds me that my mindset - my attitude - plays a crucial role in addressing inevitable issues that arise. Having a positive way of thinking isn’t always enough. However, when I can learn from my mistakes and seek support as needed, I feel more in control and less like a victim.

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Janice Walton is a psychologist, a widow, a mother, a grandmother, a great-grandmother, and a writer. She has written a newsletter on Substack for four years.