22 Comments

This change in thinking allows me to be kinder to myself and appreciate my efforts. The more significant mistake would be if I didn’t try.

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You're speaking my language as usual, Janice. Our situations are so similar and so are our fears. I've made plenty of mistakes since Ed died. (Not that I didn't before...) So many, I'm getting way too cautious. I'm constantly trying to come to terms with my place here and my time left., and I'm not having enough fun. No great experiences, no thrilling chance-takers, nothing.

This move took all the effort I could manage. I'm happy here, but not entirely satisfied. I'm staying home too much when there are endless possibilities around here.

Every lingering pain signals the possibility of a life-changing event. Is this the beginning of the end?

And then I resolve to live each day fully since I don't know how many are left.

Living fully and being afraid to make mistakes will almost certainly clash, so I most often opt NOT to live all that fully and just plod along, hoping for the best.

I'm driving myself mad!

So here I am, reading what you've written here and promising myself to do better.

Thank you. I needed this. Again. ❤️

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Ramona, Oh my gosh, I needed to read this. I was thinking about you as you moved and can imagine the effort it took. Mine was only across an apartment complex - so moving to a new town had to be extreme. I know that battle of living fully, not wanting to waste my time, and all the fear. One thing for sure, we have to be kind to ourselves and honor what we are accomplishing at our age and with the massive changes that are occurring. Take care!

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So true. I try to embrace Thomas Edison's philosophy, "I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work." Regardless of the result, we have the opportunity to learn from what we've done.

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Hi Darla, That's the part I want to work on, learning from the mis-take and making better choices.

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I usually jump right to the how how you do it wrong step! Am a fan of Brene Brown's book, 'The Gifts Of Imperfection', that allows grace and vulnerability in trying. Life is hard on us; we need to be our friend. Appreciate you Janice!

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That's a good book, for sure.

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An excellent lesson for all of us, thank you Janice.

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Hi Donna, And sometimes a lesson hard to remember.

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As you say, "The key is to acknowledge when you make a mistake, learn from it, and move on." It does help to look at our mistakes as LEARNING. What did I learn from this mistake? It is a positive way at beginning to right the wrong. Thanks Janice. You may be old, but you are always so wise.

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Hi Sharron I agree. And to take actions based on what we learned.

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What a beautiful post, Janice! And thank you for mentioning my recent blog post. I have so much admiration for you trying to navigate a whole new stage of life after so many years. After reading this, I trust that you are doing all you can to make this time of life work for you and that in doing so, you will find joy in the living. I have quite a number of friends who are learning to live again after losing their life partners. I will definitely recommend this site to them as you have wisdom they need to hear!

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Hi Cathey, The navigation process is not as easy as I thought - and some days are more challenging than others. But it is the goal!

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Great advice! I am trying to practice this every day. ❤️❤️

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Bravo, to you Kate.

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Wonderful insights and reflections as always, Janice. I love reading about your journey of self-awareness and evolution.

From early on, I've felt that the only constant in life is change, - 18 relocations, 10 countries, 3 companies, my own business, and lots of seismic caregiver activity, which you're aware of...

So, I can safely say that staying curious and open to learning has kept me sane.

Agility and no assumptions have helped me to move through...to learn better choices for the next time...but also to navigate the unpredictability - because the circumstances of an event have kept changing too! ..when so many variables change it's hard to find reference-points, to apply best practices!!! Thoughts?!?

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The one thing I'm not used to is how fast things are changing. Not so much with the world, tech, politics, etc., but what's happening in my own myopic world. It's just weird. Aging. Ain't it grand?

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Sometimes!

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Haha, better than the alternative :)

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For sure

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I appreciate your growing wisdom. You may like this catchy tune "It Is What It Is" by Don Neely of the Royal Society Jazz Orchestra. It is posted on their home page https://royalsocietyjazzorchestra.com/main.html

Thank you!

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Hi Jan, I loved the song - the music ad the words - and how true 'It Is What It is."

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