Janice, thank you for this - a great reference for all of us. I had a remarkable medical experience yesterday. I had scheduled an implant (as part of replacing a missing molar) with the periodontist. When I got to his office and sat in the chair, I had serious 2nd thoughts. Was this really necessary? Couldn’t I get along without the implant (and then a crown; it’s a multi-step process)? The doctor, instead of waving me away, said sure let’s talk about it. Within five minutes we decided together that I would not do the (ugh!) implant procedure. If you were my mother, he told me, I would say you don’t have to do this. So I got up and walked out, thanking him. He’s going to refund me the hefty fee I’d already paid him. I guess this is one for the books!
Since retirement and loss of employer dental insurance, my spouse and I have been hit with insane dental issues. Between the 2 of us, there will be 5 extractions (mainly due to old root canals gone bad) and 3 implants. 2 were last molars and we said no to implants. The time from start to finish, the visits, the bone grafts, the sinus lifts, the plasma stuff and the cost! In 2025, Quicken told me the periodontist was our highest payee for the year! One implant is done, one is being implanted on Monday and the 3rd is down the road some. I think about the small ROI at our age and wonder when we will sya no more! I applaud you.
Hi Debbie, what a great outcome. I had a similar success story several years ago - I needed an implant or a bridge to replace a broken tooth. The dentist explained the pros and cons, and we decided together on the bridge. I've always appreciated that conversation and the way it went.
I love this post! I’m a primary care doctor x 25 year whose goal is to empower patients - and to be their best self advocates in medical settings. It’s a jungle out there! I’d love to send you a copy of my forthcoming book, Beyond the Prescription: A Doctor’s Guide to Taking Charge of Your Health (Simon & Schuster, August 2026). Thank you for your work. I love it. Lucy
Hi Lucy, I love it and will watch for your book when it comes out. It's right in line with my thinking. My new book was published yesterday. The Insider's Guide to Aging Well Through the Eyes of an 87-Year-Old is a compilation of the most important insights I've written over the last five years.
Hi Janice ~. as I told you earlier, I have an awesome cardiologist and nurse practitioner in Findlay. So I'm a bit disappointed trying to arrange cardio rehab at my local hospital so I don't have to travel over there. Even though my doc FAXed orders twice, no one called me to start the rehab. So I became my own advocate and went out to the cardio rehab center to see what was going on first hand. They said they never got any orders so they called my doc to get another set. While the nurse was talking to my doc's office, she waved me off saying she was getting the orders and she'd call me. Ok. That was over 4 days ago. I'm about to get more assertive. -- maybe aggressive. ha ha! Thanks for the article; it's giving the push I need. {{Hugs}}
Hi Jan, that sounds about right - the brush off. I'm not known for my aggressiveness or assertiveness, for that matter. However, they seem to be skills I want to have in place -especially as I get older.
I admit to a certain advantage insofar as I trained and practiced in the allopathic tradition. However, I flamed out after a prolonged period of rising disaffection with a profound case of moral injury at a thousand little changes that progressively poisoned the environment of care. Now, all my age-mate peers have retired or are nearly so, so I find myself on the other side of the exam table like every other consumer of health care services. I am utterly fearful of having to enter a hospital for care and discover just how much further down the slippery slope things have gone, with an understaffed, chronically traumatized workforce in the wake of COVID and the current insanity of the federal regime and it's "health care leaders". While I speak the language, it isn't easy for Mohammed to move the mountain. Much more likely is having to acquiesce to an environment that reminds me just why I bailed out.
We must always advocate for ourselves. Unfortunately I have had far too many medical visits for my young 77 years. Be brave, listen carefully, ask questions , and, if possible , bring a second set of ears.
"If a doctor refuses to run a test or provide requested treatment, we can ask them to document their reasoning in our medical record." - This. Right here.
I had NO IDEA I could do this, gosh I wish I'd known this before Carl died. I'm. thrilled to know it moving forward.
What a wonderful article, thank you, as always for your work. You turned Dan's demise into helping save the rest of us... gosh, it can't get more priceless than this, than turning it around through your tragic loss.
Hi Robyn, I so agree about our agency getting lost in the system. I hadn't realized it so profoundly until I was caring for husband and had to interact with many of them on his behalf.
A wise question to be asking ourselves is: “How can I be my own advocate in medical settings?
Such an all-important topic in this day and age, when doctors are in short supply and ALWAYS in a hurry. Thank you, Janice, for keeping us thinking,
Hi Sharron, it does seem like the current systems aren't set up in a patient's favor, doesn't it?
Yes. It can be very frustrating. I have two friends who were held up for months due to hurried misdiagnoses. Patients get rushed through.
Thank you Janice - this was an excellent reminder of why and how we need to make our voices heard.
Always insightful
Janice, thank you for this - a great reference for all of us. I had a remarkable medical experience yesterday. I had scheduled an implant (as part of replacing a missing molar) with the periodontist. When I got to his office and sat in the chair, I had serious 2nd thoughts. Was this really necessary? Couldn’t I get along without the implant (and then a crown; it’s a multi-step process)? The doctor, instead of waving me away, said sure let’s talk about it. Within five minutes we decided together that I would not do the (ugh!) implant procedure. If you were my mother, he told me, I would say you don’t have to do this. So I got up and walked out, thanking him. He’s going to refund me the hefty fee I’d already paid him. I guess this is one for the books!
Since retirement and loss of employer dental insurance, my spouse and I have been hit with insane dental issues. Between the 2 of us, there will be 5 extractions (mainly due to old root canals gone bad) and 3 implants. 2 were last molars and we said no to implants. The time from start to finish, the visits, the bone grafts, the sinus lifts, the plasma stuff and the cost! In 2025, Quicken told me the periodontist was our highest payee for the year! One implant is done, one is being implanted on Monday and the 3rd is down the road some. I think about the small ROI at our age and wonder when we will sya no more! I applaud you.
Hi Debbie, what a great outcome. I had a similar success story several years ago - I needed an implant or a bridge to replace a broken tooth. The dentist explained the pros and cons, and we decided together on the bridge. I've always appreciated that conversation and the way it went.
I love this post! I’m a primary care doctor x 25 year whose goal is to empower patients - and to be their best self advocates in medical settings. It’s a jungle out there! I’d love to send you a copy of my forthcoming book, Beyond the Prescription: A Doctor’s Guide to Taking Charge of Your Health (Simon & Schuster, August 2026). Thank you for your work. I love it. Lucy
Hi Lucy, I love it and will watch for your book when it comes out. It's right in line with my thinking. My new book was published yesterday. The Insider's Guide to Aging Well Through the Eyes of an 87-Year-Old is a compilation of the most important insights I've written over the last five years.
Hi Janice ~. as I told you earlier, I have an awesome cardiologist and nurse practitioner in Findlay. So I'm a bit disappointed trying to arrange cardio rehab at my local hospital so I don't have to travel over there. Even though my doc FAXed orders twice, no one called me to start the rehab. So I became my own advocate and went out to the cardio rehab center to see what was going on first hand. They said they never got any orders so they called my doc to get another set. While the nurse was talking to my doc's office, she waved me off saying she was getting the orders and she'd call me. Ok. That was over 4 days ago. I'm about to get more assertive. -- maybe aggressive. ha ha! Thanks for the article; it's giving the push I need. {{Hugs}}
Hi Jan, that sounds about right - the brush off. I'm not known for my aggressiveness or assertiveness, for that matter. However, they seem to be skills I want to have in place -especially as I get older.
I admit to a certain advantage insofar as I trained and practiced in the allopathic tradition. However, I flamed out after a prolonged period of rising disaffection with a profound case of moral injury at a thousand little changes that progressively poisoned the environment of care. Now, all my age-mate peers have retired or are nearly so, so I find myself on the other side of the exam table like every other consumer of health care services. I am utterly fearful of having to enter a hospital for care and discover just how much further down the slippery slope things have gone, with an understaffed, chronically traumatized workforce in the wake of COVID and the current insanity of the federal regime and it's "health care leaders". While I speak the language, it isn't easy for Mohammed to move the mountain. Much more likely is having to acquiesce to an environment that reminds me just why I bailed out.
Hi, and to me, your post emphasizes the need for each of us to become our own advocate.
We must always advocate for ourselves. Unfortunately I have had far too many medical visits for my young 77 years. Be brave, listen carefully, ask questions , and, if possible , bring a second set of ears.
Hi Karen, those sound like great ideas.
"If a doctor refuses to run a test or provide requested treatment, we can ask them to document their reasoning in our medical record." - This. Right here.
I had NO IDEA I could do this, gosh I wish I'd known this before Carl died. I'm. thrilled to know it moving forward.
What a wonderful article, thank you, as always for your work. You turned Dan's demise into helping save the rest of us... gosh, it can't get more priceless than this, than turning it around through your tragic loss.
Hi Patti, it sure is something I didn't know either.
Great piece Janice. It’s so easy to let agency slip to the system but your sound advice helps educate in advance.
Hi Robyn, I so agree about our agency getting lost in the system. I hadn't realized it so profoundly until I was caring for husband and had to interact with many of them on his behalf.
This advice is not just for the elderly but all ages!
Hi CK, absolutely true.