Janice, I’ve been thinking about many of the same things (my relationship with myself and how it affects everything) and plan to write about that soon. Thanks for your very informative post.
I'm gradually building a kind and caring relationship with myself Janice - it's taken 76 years. And little by little as I allow more to disappear from my life (old thoughts around must/should) I'm allowing myself to come first. It truly is liberating but it takes some changes within. My most recent post has more to share! Glad you are finding helpful ways to support yourself kindly and with self compassion
"Missed-takes" is going in my vocabulary. The double standard you describe is so common: kind to everyone but ourselves. The research backs you up, too. A review of 27 studies found self-compassion training reduced self-criticism and improved well-being. Love that you're having your own back at 87.
"Solitude is healing and my desire for time alone is strong after being with others. It truly is rejuvenating."
I am finding the same is true for me. I am usually alone, but I am never lonely. I've been enjoying your latest book so much, Janice. I encourage others to get a copy! Such thoughtful, practical advice to consider.
Right now I'm trying to talk to my adult self -- "clean up that mess; get the laundry done. You've been playing too much." I've let the little girl in me loose this summer. I am noticing my arthritis, my balance and my heart are limiting some of the things I love to do. I will have to accept that part of me more. xoxo
Your insight and perspective are so very helpful. Have you ever thought 🤔 of gathering like women for conversation and support; either in person or remotely?
Hi Sharon, That's kind of what I'm trying to do with this newsletter for now, but I've thought about having a weekly zoom meeting - but it's only in the idea phase at the moment.
This is great advice for those who may not have a kind and accepting relationship with themselves. I suffered from codependency for many years: putting others' needs over my own and not practicing self-care because I was so unhappy with myself. Thankfully, through reading, research, and a handful of therapy sessions, I realized how much I needed to change.
Your post is full of good advice that can most certainly set others on a better path!
Such excellent information and also a great reminder...especially this line, that healthy aging is ". . . cultivating mental clarity, nurturing our spirit, and maintaining our physical vitality . . ." This is actually why I go to yoga, because it connects mind, body and spirit. When I'm older I'll be going to chair yoga! In the meantime I will be kinder to myself today, so thank you for that reminder too.
Hi, I agree, it seems as if we tend to focus on the physical which is important for sure ,but often overlook the other two and they are equally important, too.
A question to ponder is this "What does my relationship with myself look like? In other words, are we for ourselves or against us?
Janice, I’ve been thinking about many of the same things (my relationship with myself and how it affects everything) and plan to write about that soon. Thanks for your very informative post.
I'm gradually building a kind and caring relationship with myself Janice - it's taken 76 years. And little by little as I allow more to disappear from my life (old thoughts around must/should) I'm allowing myself to come first. It truly is liberating but it takes some changes within. My most recent post has more to share! Glad you are finding helpful ways to support yourself kindly and with self compassion
Denyse x
A great reminder to follow our own advice to consider the same kindness we extend to others.
Very resonant:)
"Missed-takes" is going in my vocabulary. The double standard you describe is so common: kind to everyone but ourselves. The research backs you up, too. A review of 27 studies found self-compassion training reduced self-criticism and improved well-being. Love that you're having your own back at 87.
Hi Heather, I guess in the long run each of us has our own back - we know ourselves best and we make the choices.
I just started my 4th new journal today (just turned 86), and wrote many of your thoughts from this article on the first page. Thank you.
Hi Karen, I’m just learning how important this relationship really is.
"Solitude is healing and my desire for time alone is strong after being with others. It truly is rejuvenating."
I am finding the same is true for me. I am usually alone, but I am never lonely. I've been enjoying your latest book so much, Janice. I encourage others to get a copy! Such thoughtful, practical advice to consider.
Hi Sharron, Thanks so much. I've started writing another book - we'll see how that goes. I am surprised how much I enjoy being by myself.
You are absolutely tireless, Janice. How do you do it!
Right now I'm trying to talk to my adult self -- "clean up that mess; get the laundry done. You've been playing too much." I've let the little girl in me loose this summer. I am noticing my arthritis, my balance and my heart are limiting some of the things I love to do. I will have to accept that part of me more. xoxo
Hi Jan, Yes, unfortunately we have to make adjustment it seems.
Your insight and perspective are so very helpful. Have you ever thought 🤔 of gathering like women for conversation and support; either in person or remotely?
Hi Sharon, That's kind of what I'm trying to do with this newsletter for now, but I've thought about having a weekly zoom meeting - but it's only in the idea phase at the moment.
This is great advice for those who may not have a kind and accepting relationship with themselves. I suffered from codependency for many years: putting others' needs over my own and not practicing self-care because I was so unhappy with myself. Thankfully, through reading, research, and a handful of therapy sessions, I realized how much I needed to change.
Your post is full of good advice that can most certainly set others on a better path!
Such excellent information and also a great reminder...especially this line, that healthy aging is ". . . cultivating mental clarity, nurturing our spirit, and maintaining our physical vitality . . ." This is actually why I go to yoga, because it connects mind, body and spirit. When I'm older I'll be going to chair yoga! In the meantime I will be kinder to myself today, so thank you for that reminder too.
Hi, I agree, it seems as if we tend to focus on the physical which is important for sure ,but often overlook the other two and they are equally important, too.