No amount of outside help or support groups can alter the fact that your life was upended and will never be the same. And no one can put a timeline or a structure on grieving. Baby steps will lead you along a beautiful path that you have yet to explore. I see you enjoying the small moments and I'm happy for you.💙
"I continue writing ... I don’t push myself to get over the grief or move on ... Some days are better than others." I am exactly with you here, Janice. The solitude, the quiet reflection, the self-permission to grieve as long as I need to. Those have helped me most. Thank you.
I became a in home caregiver for Carol, who has dementia, Lewy, body, dementia, and Alzheimer’s. I have worked with her for two years, and now I’m going on my third.. I see the importance of taking care of yourself. We have to be able to care for ourselves first of all before we can care for others. Prior to coming here i had worked with behavioral children in a school setting. I am 75 years young, and I work three days a week, But I am very grateful for my job and grateful that I can work with Carol.
When you say would've been more assertive do you mean when it came to getting support for yourself? Stressing to Dan the importance of having some help regardless of him not wanting anyone in the home? Or are there other ways you wish you would've been more assertive?
(Sorry Janice, that question is very poorly worded!)
Hi Donna, Yes, assertive with Dan in allowing in-home care which would have provided respite for me, with the memory care facility because they may have met his needs, but not mine, and in asking for help sooner.
My wife and I are boomers so we know that this could happen to us. Having been a carer for my wife when she broke her shoulder and wrist I got a small taste of what you go through. Both of us agreed that should it come to this we either get a full time carer or the person goes in the home!
Hi, Experience tells me you are wise. I have already made the decision to use in-home caregivers first and know who I would hire and have selected an assisted living facility if that becomes necessary. Not having made those decisions in place can leave a person in a difficult position - like we were during the pandemic. We didn't have the luxury of making the best decisions at the time.
No amount of outside help or support groups can alter the fact that your life was upended and will never be the same. And no one can put a timeline or a structure on grieving. Baby steps will lead you along a beautiful path that you have yet to explore. I see you enjoying the small moments and I'm happy for you.💙
"I continue writing ... I don’t push myself to get over the grief or move on ... Some days are better than others." I am exactly with you here, Janice. The solitude, the quiet reflection, the self-permission to grieve as long as I need to. Those have helped me most. Thank you.
I became a in home caregiver for Carol, who has dementia, Lewy, body, dementia, and Alzheimer’s. I have worked with her for two years, and now I’m going on my third.. I see the importance of taking care of yourself. We have to be able to care for ourselves first of all before we can care for others. Prior to coming here i had worked with behavioral children in a school setting. I am 75 years young, and I work three days a week, But I am very grateful for my job and grateful that I can work with Carol.
Mary, thank you so much for commenting. I totally agree with you about self care and it sounds as if you have done well.
When you say would've been more assertive do you mean when it came to getting support for yourself? Stressing to Dan the importance of having some help regardless of him not wanting anyone in the home? Or are there other ways you wish you would've been more assertive?
(Sorry Janice, that question is very poorly worded!)
Hi Donna, Yes, assertive with Dan in allowing in-home care which would have provided respite for me, with the memory care facility because they may have met his needs, but not mine, and in asking for help sooner.
Thank you Janice.
My wife and I are boomers so we know that this could happen to us. Having been a carer for my wife when she broke her shoulder and wrist I got a small taste of what you go through. Both of us agreed that should it come to this we either get a full time carer or the person goes in the home!
Hi, Experience tells me you are wise. I have already made the decision to use in-home caregivers first and know who I would hire and have selected an assisted living facility if that becomes necessary. Not having made those decisions in place can leave a person in a difficult position - like we were during the pandemic. We didn't have the luxury of making the best decisions at the time.