Triggers. Difficult behavior. I am afraid for when the "shoe will be on the other foot". My mother had no behavioral problems when I was caring for her. She was always calm and sweet. Now I am thinking about myself and what kinds of behavioral problems I will present to my son when he has to be my caregiver. What will trigger me? I hate to imagine it. I am thinking I should thank him and beg his forgiveness in advance for what is to come! Ha ha ha.
I think this must be one of the most difficult things. Sometimes it may also come down to the person's personality before they got sick, is there a thread of how they have always been (stubborn, resistant, narrow perspective) that is playing a bigger role? I'm afraid if this is the case I find it difficult to dig deep for empathy, whereas if the person was lovely and easy-going before their illness but now is struggling I think I would be able to be more receptive to their plight.
I recognize the character flaw in this argument🤣 -mine, not the other person's - and if they are sick it should not matter what came before! I think I have some work to do on myself. This is excellent info Janice, it is very helpful to consider the triggers and responses.
Hi Donna, Happy Thanksgiving to you as well. Have a lovely one. Your point is well taken. What I saw with Dan was that he became or reverted back to his father's personality. I knew his Dad since I was twelve and more than once during the dementia years, I thought I was seeing him in Dan's behavior. It was like Dan had a filter or a set of guidelines that he lived by which included thoughtfulness, kindness, and helping others. But when the dementia took over, the filters collapsed and he reverted to what he knew or saw as a child.
As family caregivers, one of our biggest problems is managing a loved one’s behavior. They can be argumentative, resistant, and defiant.
Triggers. Difficult behavior. I am afraid for when the "shoe will be on the other foot". My mother had no behavioral problems when I was caring for her. She was always calm and sweet. Now I am thinking about myself and what kinds of behavioral problems I will present to my son when he has to be my caregiver. What will trigger me? I hate to imagine it. I am thinking I should thank him and beg his forgiveness in advance for what is to come! Ha ha ha.
Hi Sharron, You make a very good point - looking at our own potential triggers.
I think this must be one of the most difficult things. Sometimes it may also come down to the person's personality before they got sick, is there a thread of how they have always been (stubborn, resistant, narrow perspective) that is playing a bigger role? I'm afraid if this is the case I find it difficult to dig deep for empathy, whereas if the person was lovely and easy-going before their illness but now is struggling I think I would be able to be more receptive to their plight.
I recognize the character flaw in this argument🤣 -mine, not the other person's - and if they are sick it should not matter what came before! I think I have some work to do on myself. This is excellent info Janice, it is very helpful to consider the triggers and responses.
PS: Happy Thanksgiving from Canada!
Hi Donna, Happy Thanksgiving to you as well. Have a lovely one. Your point is well taken. What I saw with Dan was that he became or reverted back to his father's personality. I knew his Dad since I was twelve and more than once during the dementia years, I thought I was seeing him in Dan's behavior. It was like Dan had a filter or a set of guidelines that he lived by which included thoughtfulness, kindness, and helping others. But when the dementia took over, the filters collapsed and he reverted to what he knew or saw as a child.