I was so proud of my father when he first started to show signs of dementia, and the doctor diagnosed him has having Alzheimer's, that he voluntarily handed over the keys and also announced that he was going to be the best Alzheimer's patient there was. Of course in time he forgot why he couldn't drive, but this was at least one worry sh…
I was so proud of my father when he first started to show signs of dementia, and the doctor diagnosed him has having Alzheimer's, that he voluntarily handed over the keys and also announced that he was going to be the best Alzheimer's patient there was. Of course in time he forgot why he couldn't drive, but this was at least one worry she didn't have. However there were lots of struggles over his insistence in doing various tasks around the house that required him to climb ladders and use power tools. And I know that until he got to the stage where my step mother could just distract and he would forget what he wanted to do, this was a constant struggle. Thankfully, when we got him into a small home, his experience (and hers) was much better than yours--off course this was also long before Covid. Besides occasionally wondering why he couldn't get in the car and go home with her, he was well taken care of, staying in a lovely serene homelike environment (only 8 patients) with same people taking care of him, and my step mother able to visit him daily, play the piano for him, etc. And I do know that the tool that continued to work best (I lived 3 states away, but visited 3-4 times a year, a week at a time to give her a chance to get out of town) was to simply come up with some simple answer then distract. I am ever grateful for the almost decade where i was able to watch movie musicals with him, singing along at the top of our voices, take him for a hot fudge sundae, and eventually just sit and read poetry to him as he slept more and more. i know this is not the experience that many have, and I certainly didn't have the couple of difficult years of transition with him, or the full responsibility my step mother had. But I also know that so much of the advice you are giving could be a life saver for those going through this difficult task. I do hope knowing you might be helping others can give you some relief from the pain of your own experience.
I was so proud of my father when he first started to show signs of dementia, and the doctor diagnosed him has having Alzheimer's, that he voluntarily handed over the keys and also announced that he was going to be the best Alzheimer's patient there was. Of course in time he forgot why he couldn't drive, but this was at least one worry she didn't have. However there were lots of struggles over his insistence in doing various tasks around the house that required him to climb ladders and use power tools. And I know that until he got to the stage where my step mother could just distract and he would forget what he wanted to do, this was a constant struggle. Thankfully, when we got him into a small home, his experience (and hers) was much better than yours--off course this was also long before Covid. Besides occasionally wondering why he couldn't get in the car and go home with her, he was well taken care of, staying in a lovely serene homelike environment (only 8 patients) with same people taking care of him, and my step mother able to visit him daily, play the piano for him, etc. And I do know that the tool that continued to work best (I lived 3 states away, but visited 3-4 times a year, a week at a time to give her a chance to get out of town) was to simply come up with some simple answer then distract. I am ever grateful for the almost decade where i was able to watch movie musicals with him, singing along at the top of our voices, take him for a hot fudge sundae, and eventually just sit and read poetry to him as he slept more and more. i know this is not the experience that many have, and I certainly didn't have the couple of difficult years of transition with him, or the full responsibility my step mother had. But I also know that so much of the advice you are giving could be a life saver for those going through this difficult task. I do hope knowing you might be helping others can give you some relief from the pain of your own experience.
Hi , That was the redeeming grace for me, he forgot what was said immediately. So, the same old story got me through over and over again.