Melancholy can come on any time. Yes, oftentimes during a holiday season. Life brings blessings and pain. We are who and what G-d has given and so we are grateful. As we know, all of it, and this too, will pass. It is not dark, but bittersweet. May you know love.
How does one accept loss? I'm struggling at the moment but the Eastern beliefs are that one can honour the ones we've lost and accept that all life is impermanent. If we can encourage ourselves to believe that, the heaviness of loss lightens.
To me it makes complete sense. One can love with one's whole heart but there is perhaps more respect for the departed by untethering the sadness and letting it drift away, replacing it with honour, respect and moving on with life. I think the Eastern beliefs have so much to offer and I shall be actively encouraging myself to follow that path.
Hi Prue, I have actually begun looking into Eastern beliefs. I know that you have been struggling with loss as well, and you have encouraged me to keep looking in that direction. Take care.
I appreciate this essay Janice because, on a much smaller scale, I'm feeling the same thing. My Mom died last November so both of my parents are gone and this is the first year we don't have a child returning home from University which is fun and adds a dose of sparkle and anticipation to the house. It's feeling hard to rally any excitement.
I find I tend to focus (too much) on the losses and what is missing rather than what is there so I welcome posts like this.
"...aging well is easier said than done." It calls for conscious effort and vigilance, which I find a real challenge. Your reminders do help, Janice!
"...Accept what’s true now, and look for the bits and pieces of happiness in the moment." This works best for me. I see a change or loss or challenge and say This is my life now. Make the most of it!
I'm in Part 2 of the season. I made it through Thanksgiving, and I loved it this year. I'm not sure how I'll handle Christmas. Safe to say I hope we come up with something radically different than what I miss, it will help me get through... the goal for this year is no tears. I hope you can find a bit of cheer, I'll be thinking of you. Hugs, XX
I hope the holiday season works out better than just okay for you Janice. You've set realistic intentions and that's a great bedrock to bring about good changes.
Last year, I promised to have a better attitude about the holidays, but next year is here, and so are the same feelings.
Melancholy can come on any time. Yes, oftentimes during a holiday season. Life brings blessings and pain. We are who and what G-d has given and so we are grateful. As we know, all of it, and this too, will pass. It is not dark, but bittersweet. May you know love.
I hope you can find small pieces of joy this year. Have you ever volunteered during the holidays?
Hi, Not recently, but I'm thinking about it again- not only during the holidays but in general.
How does one accept loss? I'm struggling at the moment but the Eastern beliefs are that one can honour the ones we've lost and accept that all life is impermanent. If we can encourage ourselves to believe that, the heaviness of loss lightens.
To me it makes complete sense. One can love with one's whole heart but there is perhaps more respect for the departed by untethering the sadness and letting it drift away, replacing it with honour, respect and moving on with life. I think the Eastern beliefs have so much to offer and I shall be actively encouraging myself to follow that path.
Hi Prue, I have actually begun looking into Eastern beliefs. I know that you have been struggling with loss as well, and you have encouraged me to keep looking in that direction. Take care.
I appreciate this essay Janice because, on a much smaller scale, I'm feeling the same thing. My Mom died last November so both of my parents are gone and this is the first year we don't have a child returning home from University which is fun and adds a dose of sparkle and anticipation to the house. It's feeling hard to rally any excitement.
I find I tend to focus (too much) on the losses and what is missing rather than what is there so I welcome posts like this.
"...aging well is easier said than done." It calls for conscious effort and vigilance, which I find a real challenge. Your reminders do help, Janice!
"...Accept what’s true now, and look for the bits and pieces of happiness in the moment." This works best for me. I see a change or loss or challenge and say This is my life now. Make the most of it!
Hi Sharron - and that is the bottom line of it! This is my life now. Make the most of it.
Lots of love to you. i think it is good to acknowledge that sadness and emotion. You can do that and create new traditions. Big hugs x
Hi Cali, I do agree. The feelings are a part of the new traditions we build. Take care!
I'm in Part 2 of the season. I made it through Thanksgiving, and I loved it this year. I'm not sure how I'll handle Christmas. Safe to say I hope we come up with something radically different than what I miss, it will help me get through... the goal for this year is no tears. I hope you can find a bit of cheer, I'll be thinking of you. Hugs, XX
Hi Patti, I'm betting that you will, and that is my goal: focus on the cheer. Thanks!
I grieve my losses and also try hard to enjoy the holidays. Not always easy
Hi Susan, Very true, not always easy.
I hope your resolve will bring unexpected beauty and love!
Me too, Kate.
I hope the holiday season works out better than just okay for you Janice. You've set realistic intentions and that's a great bedrock to bring about good changes.
Thank you, Lee; I think it is a step in the right direction.